tv Late Night With Jimmy Fallon NBC October 2, 2012 12:35am-1:35am EDT
you got me, got me like this uh ♪ ♪ and now you're taking her to every restaurant and everywhere we went come on! ♪ ♪ and now you're taking her to every restaurant you got me, got me like this uh ♪ ♪ boy, you can say anything you wanna i don't give a no one else can have ya ♪ ♪ i want you back i want you back wa-want you, want you back uh ♪ ♪ i broke it off thinking you'd be cryin' now i feel like looking at you flyin' ♪ ♪ i want you back i want you back wa-want you, want you back uh ♪ ♪ ooh-ooh-ooh i thought you'd still be mine when i kissed you goodbye uh oh, uh oh ♪ ♪ oh-oh-oh and you might be with her but i still had you first uh oh, uh oh ♪ ♪ remember all the things that you and i did first? and now you're doing them with her ♪ ♪ remember all the things that you and i did first? yo!
remember all the things! ♪ ♪ that you and i did first? and now you're doing them with her remember all the things ♪ ♪ that you and i did first? you got me, got me like this boy, you can say anything you wanna ♪ ♪ i don't give a no one else can have ya i want you back i want you back ♪ ♪ wa-want you, want you back uh i broke it off thinking you'd be cryin' ♪ ♪ now i feel like looking at you flyin' i want you back i want you back ♪ ♪ wa-want you, want you back uh ooh-ooh-ooh la la la la laaa ♪ ♪ i want you back i want you back wa-want you, want you back uh ♪ ♪ ooh-ooh-ooh i want you back i want you back wa-want you, want you back ♪ ♪ uh [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: there you go, cher lloyd! nice job. that was great. thank you so much. that was terrific. thank you, thank you. i want to thank my guests,
bryan cranston, rebel wilson, of course, cher lloyd. tomorrow night, carol burnett will be here. but emmy winner jimmy fallon coming up right now, jimmy! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center, the national broadcasting company presents -- tonight's guests are -- and featuring the legendary roots crew. and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
>> jimmy: aw, thank you so much. i feel the love. i feel the love. what a great crowd. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. that's a lot of love right there. thank you so much. [ cheers and applause ] makes me feel good. good way to kick off the week. here's what people are talking about. on saturday night, justin bieber -- [ laughter ] justin bieber threw up on stage during the first stop of his concert tour. even weirder, the sound of bieber throwing up just hit number one on the billboard chart. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: it's got a beat. it's got a beat. >> jimmy: it's that or "gangnam style." it's a toss-up. some sports news. the jets suffered their first shutout in two years after losing to the 49ers, 34-0. [ booing ] that's right. and absolutely no scoring or as tim tebow calls that, a date. [ laughter and applause ]
"no, no, no. hands off! save room for the holy ghost." >> steve: exactly. [ laughter ] there we go. >> jimmy: catholic -- there we go. [ applause ] i want to say congratulations to yahoo! ceo marissa mayer who gave birth to a baby boy yesterday. though it was a little awkward when her baby's first sounds were, "ga-ga-google." [ laughter ] i wish he'd say that. >> steve: ga-ga-google. >> jimmy: it's a clean joke. you can tell your -- [ rim shot ] yeah, thank you. thank you. i appreciate that. >> steve: i thought it was gonna be about yahoo! -- at first. >> jimmy: no. >> steve: okay. >> jimmy: everybody's talking about this arnold schwarzenegger interview on "60 minutes" last night. he talked about all kinds of crazy stuff -- his affairs, his open-heart surgery. he also revealed that he performed two same-sex marriages while he was governor of california. of course, the marriages aren't official because the couples
couldn't understand what arnold was saying. [ laughter ] [ as schwarzenegger ] >> "do you take this man to be the other man and the man man thing that we do right now with the man." [ applause ] >> jimmy: "uh, yeah. what?" [ as schwarzenegger ] >> "put the ring on the finger! get down!" [ laughter ] he's yelling at me, going -- [ as schwarzenegger ] >> jimmy: why? on one knee. this is kind of scary. on saturday, an american airlines flight made an emergency landing at jfk when a row of seats became unbolted and started sliding around the plane. [ laughter ] it was weird. people were like, "oh, great. i'm sitting near the bathroom again. whoa, i'm in first class! i'm a pilot! what's going on?" [ applause ] it's kind of fun that way. very interactive. >> steve: it's a good time. like a roller coaster. >> jimmy: yeah. the animated movie, "hotel transylvania," came in number one at the box office this weekend. [ cheers and applause ]
it was about a place where people are free to be the monsters they really are, or as most people call that, the bravo network. [ laughter ] [ audience ohs ] they went for it on the reunion last night. they went for it. yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. you saw it? oh, man. now they're all nuts. >> steve: yeah, all of them. >> jimmy: used to be, like, caroline. they used to have, like, one person who wasn't nuts. >> steve: nope, now it's a free-for-all. >> jimmy: now they're all crazy. [ light laughter ] they're all crazy, and they're ready just to fight. and they go for the jugulars, like, "really? how about your mother?" like, "my mother! really? how about your father?" it's like -- people are crying. it's, like, what is going on? oh, so fascinating. finally, you guys, police in florida were called this weekend after 400 pounds of marijuana washed up on the beach. [ cheers ] the police became suspicious when people stopped building sandcastles and started building white castles. [ laughter ] we have a great show tonight! give it up for the roots! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
>> jimmy: hey, everybody! oh, welcome, and thank you for watching our show. i appreciate it. it is a -- it's kind of a big anniversary for all of us who work here in studio 6b because 50 years ago today, johnny carson began his "tonight show" run in this very spot. [ cheers and applause ] johnny carson was here in 6b -- that's the name of our studio -- 10 years, and then he moved out to l.a. but for the first 10 years, he was here. when tiny tim got married. remember tiny tim? not the charles dickens character. the other guy? [ laughter ] he got married, he was here. the highest rating -- the highest rated "tonight show" ever, to this day, was that wedding. and you can see it on youtube probably. but anyways, if you don't know johnny carson, if you like comedy, you should learn about this guy. go to johnnycarson.com. there's clips online, dvds, documentaries. he was the greatest. so, happy anniversary to -- [ cheers and applause ]
-- to that legacy. feel the vibe. [ applause ] we have a great show tonight. from "taken 2" -- i cannot wait for this movie -- liam neeson is here, you guys! you can't get bigger. [ cheers and applause ] oh, he's good. >> steve: good dude. >> jimmy: plus, from the new comedy, "animal practice," here on nbc, joanna garcia swisher is stopping by! [ cheers and applause ] and we have music from one of my favorites out there. matt & kim are playing tonight. [ cheers and applause ] matt & kim. i'll tell you a quick, little story. they probably don't even remember this, but we had their tv debut when they were on our show. probably about a year ago or something? and it's, you know, matt and kim. there's two people. and matt's in the front, and he plays -- he's playing keyboard. maybe it was a guitar at the time. and she plays drums, amazing drums. and they were about to go on. and a lot of people can't see
what i see when i'm -- you're in the audience, and i'm here. and they're kind of right on my eye line, so i can see them -- see the band. and right before they were about to go on, he turned to kim and goes -- [ laughter ] i'll never forget that. i was like, i love these guys. they're so excited, and they hit a home run. and they're back. matt & kim are here tonight, you guys. it's gonna be fun. [ cheers and applause ] really fun. hey, you guys, you know there's a lot of bad news out there in the world, but here at "late night," we're always trying to find the silver lining. so, with that in mind, it's time for a segment we call "on the bright side." ♪ on the bright side on the bright side on the bright side ♪ >> jimmy: here's how it works. i'm gonna give you the cold, hard facts that we've pulled from some of the world's top news sources. and then, we're going to look at the bright side and give you the silver lining. okay. here we go. [ laughter ] ♪
last week, 365,000 americans filed for unemployment. on the bright side, they were all nfl replacement refs. ♪ [ laughter and applause ] ♪ halloween is coming up soon and you haven't thought of a costume. on the bright side, you can just put on a tight pageant gown and a tiara and go as here comes slutty boo boo. ♪ [ laughter and applause ] ♪ 400 pounds of marijuana washed up on shore in florida this week. on the bright side, it was a totally high tide. ♪ [ laughter and applause ]
♪ >> steve: oh. i'm scared. >> jimmy: tim tebow only made one pass during the jets' 34-0 loss. on the bright side, sunday is his day of rest. ♪ [ laughter and applause ] [ laughter ] i don't have anything on here. >> steve: it's more than move, you know what i mean? make it like you're, like -- like, i'm scared. this is gonna be bad news, but then, it's good news. ♪ >> jimmy: on saturday, the b.e.t. hip-hop awards were briefly stopped when rick ross and young jeezy got into a fight. on the bright side, they won the b.e.t. hip-hop award for the best fight at the b.e.t. hip-hop awards. ♪ [ laughter and applause ] ♪ apple is apologizing for the poor quality of their new maps app. on the bright side, it's fun to
say, "apple's maps app is crap." ♪ [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: a new survey found that 60% of americans do not trust the media to report the news accurately. on the bright side, that's probably not true. ♪ [ laughter and applause ] miley cyrus is in talks to star in a miniseries about bonnie and clyde. on the bright side, she gets to say -- ♪ put your hands up i'm robbing this bank and then i'm going to get away ♪ [ laughter ] all right. there you guys have it. ♪ those are "on the bright side." [ cheers and applause ] stick around! we'll be right back with "audience voicemails"! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ male announcer ] you know that guy
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. thank you for watching. you guys, here at "late night" we're always a step ahead when it comes to new technology. you're about to see what i mean. it's time for "audience voice mails." ♪ >> jimmy: thank you. that's right. i have here the hacker 9000. [ light laughter ] now, what this does -- it allows us to hack into anyone's phone and listen to their voice mail. this device is so top secret, we're not even supposed to be telling you about it. the only other person who knows about this is rupert murdoch. [ laughter ] let me show you how it works. you, sir, here, with the sunglasses on your head. >> hey. >> jimmy: how are you doing, buddy? >> pretty good. how are you? >> jimmy: doing great. what is your name? >> keenan. >> jimmy: keenan. >> yes sir. >> jimmy: keenan, where are you from? >> oklahoma. >> jimmy: you're from oklahoma.
very nice. [ cheers and applause ] very good. now, you have your phone with you? >> you want to see my cell phone? >> jimmy: yes, can i see your cell phone? >> absolutely, jimmy. >> jimmy: we're gonna hack into your voice mail, if you don't mind. nice iphone, right here. here we go. and listen. >> beep! hi, keenan from oklahoma, this is reginald, over at truelovewaits.biz, america's only online dating site strictly for virgins. now, we know you've been a customer with us since 1999 but we've been getting some complaints about your profile. we need you to take down the following things immediately -- one, the photo of you humping a california raisins bean bag chair. the quote in your "about me" section, where you say, "i have a thingy. it's called my dingy and sometimes i can feel it stingy." >> jimmy: okay -- >> well, i don't know what the means but if -- also, could you please do me a favor and remove the profile section where you say your favorite movie is "alvin and the chipmunks two: the squeakquel." [ light laughter ] even though it's a great movie, it's embarrassing to admit. in closing, remember -- this is
a website dating service for virgins, you're a virgin. a big virgin. huge virgin. >> jimmy: okay. >> okay, thanks, bye! >> it's not true. it's not true. >> jimmy: okay, there ya go -- an old voice mail -- it's an old voice mail. thank you, buddy. [ applause ] who else we got? how ya doin'? how about you, my friend? >> doing good. >> jimmy: how's it goin', buddy? doing good? >> good. yep. >> jimmy: good. what is your name and where are you from? >> my name is zorro and i'm from toronto. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: zorro? >> that's right. >> jimmy: wow. fantastic name. i've never met zorro before. it's a pleasure, man. this is awesome. all right. do you have your phone on you? >> i do. >> jimmy: so happy you didn't pull out a sword 'cause that would have been weird. all right. [ light laughter ] here we go. now, let's listen to your most recent voice mail. >> beep! zorro! [ laughing ] hey, what's up, dude? i was just thinking about you because i was watching "the muppets take manhattan" and, dude, you're in manhattan right now! and i know you do the best impression of kermit the frog. in fact, wherever you are, why don't you do it right now?!
come on, say, "my name is kermit the frog." come on, do it, do it! [ laughter ] zorro, come on! >> [ as kermit ] "my name is kermit the frog." >> oh! nice! nice! i somehow heard that! oh my gosh! all right, wait -- wait, wait, wait, dude. dude, before i go, do your jimmy fallon impression too. come on, do it, zorro! >> guys, we got a -- we got a great show for you guys tonight, here. who do we have here for today? liam neeson, everybody! all right, all right. that's pretty weak. that's all right. all right, nice, bro. well, i've gotta go. take it sleazy, take it breezy! take it sneazy, achoo! all right, i'm gonna go work on some rhymes. bye. [ applause ] can i go over this way? do you mind? cut through? cut across. sorry, buddy. hey. >> hello. >> jimmy: how you guys doing? i see -- thank you so much. i'm sorry. sorry to make everyone get up. i apologize. i really apologize.
oh, you didn't even to want get up. good for you. [ laughter ] you make your own rules. live in your own world. yeah. let's just -- how about -- how about you, my friend? would you like to -- participate? >> yeah, sure. >> jimmy: what is your name and where are you from? >> chris. and i'm from new jersey >> jimmy: chris from new jersey! very good. [ cheers and applause ] did you see "real housewives" last night? >> i did not. i didn't catch it. >> jimmy: oh, my goodness. all right. yeah, it was good stuff. do you have your phone on you? wow. >> -- black. >> jimmy: yeah, also a lot of black on you. >> yeah. a lot of black. >> jimmy: yeah, a whole lot of black happening. all right, here we go. here we go. -- latest voice mail. [ laughter ] >> you got it. you got it. >> beep! yo, this message is for chris! hey man, it's your college pal, andrew huey! the hue! remember back in the day, we'd hang out? it'd be me and you and that other guy? i forget his name. we used to call him spax. he always wore his hat backwards. like a plaid jacket. [ laughter ]
yeah, i don't know his name, man. but you guys used to do an awesome secret handshake, man. it was the best! >> oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. >> wherever you are, i'd love you to do that handshake. you and spax! >> jimmy: there's spax -- stand up, there. >> it was -- more of a -- >> -- the back of your hand! >> a hug -- a hand hug. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, very nice. a hand hug. >> yeah, that was a big thing. >> oh, man, it was great! now, i would love it if you tried the big one. this one you didn't use just your hands. i think you called it the two-man mountain jam nipple slam. [ laughter ] oh yeah. oh, just do it! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that was interesting. >> just do it! >> that was good. >> oh, man! >> jimmy: that was great. [ applause ] thank you, everybody. thank you. that was good, there. thanks. [ applause ] oh, do we have time for one more? we have time for one more. we can do one more, right here. how you doin', buddy? you wanna do this? how are you, buddy? wow. [ cheers and applause ]
first of all, i'm sorry. i'm sorry -- [ laughter ] we're good, we're good. man, you got some good tats, there. nice to meet ya. pleasure. what is your name? >> mike dell. >> jimmy: mike dell. where are you from, mike? >> ronkonkoma. >> jimmy: ronkonkoma? >> on long island. >> jimmy: yeah, i know ronkonkoma, absolutely. yeah. that's great. can i have your phone? let's listen to your latest voice mail. very good. yeah, that's a good -- 1997. [ laughter ] the hacker -- still works on this. here we go. it's in the hacker 9000. >> beep! hey there, sam turner from satellite records and i've your pal shaggy on the phone, here and wants to -- to have a few words with ya. [ as shaggy ] hey man, this is shaggy. i got to say, i love your matching shirt and arm. [ laughing ] i tell ya, i love that you -- have tattoos with people you don't even know. that's awesome. [ laughter ] [ rolls tongue ] ♪ i love your t-shirt
and the stoned hats i love the way your dress pants when they match ♪ ♪ dress shirt look like ed hardy even though it's -- gonna throw a party ♪ i tell you, man, i love it! watch out, man. take care. it's me, shaggy! it wasn't shaggy. i love ya hey, no! >> jimmy: shaggy -- shaggy -- he can't even get it out -- thank you, my man. [ cheers and applause ] that was the rapper, shaggy. he loves you. thank you so much, buddy. -- appreciate it. give it up for these folks, right here. they're all great sports. we'll be right back with liam neeson! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ these fellas used capital one venture miles for a golf getaway. double miles you can actually use... but mr. single miles can't join his friends because he's getting hit with blackouts. shame on you. now he's stuck in a miniature nightmare. oh, thank you. but, with the capital one venture card... you can fly any airline, any flight, any time.
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ladies and gentlemen, please welcome liam neeson! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: there's a movie star, liam neeson, right here. thank you for coming back to our show. >> great to be back, jimmy. thank you. >> jimmy: you were at the jet game. >> yeah, yeah. yesterday. we -- as a new yorker -- got trounced, i think. >> jimmy: it was -- oh, yeah. >> 34-0. >> jimmy: it was awful. yeah, i've never seen a -- have you -- are you a big football fan? >> i'm -- i'm not, jimmy. >> jimmy: yeah. yeah, you're not. >> i've only been to two games. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i don't understand the rules to be really honest. >> jimmy: no, yeah. of course. >> but i admire the athleticism. phenomenal. >> jimmy: oh yeah, well, they're good. >> my sons are big football fans.
>> jimmy: oh, you brought -- you brought the kids over there? but what -- what sports are you into? >> [ coughs ] excuse me. >> jimmy: oh, please. >> just hit me on the back. >> jimmy: sure, yeah, no problem. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: please don't hit me back. [ laughter ] you're a big guy. yeah, yeah. what sports -- >> speaking of sports -- yes, i was an amateur boxer when i was a kid. >> jimmy: you were an amateur boxer? so what -- like, who got you started? your dad? >> it was at mass one sunday -- the local parish priest. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i love that. yeah, yeah -- the priest. >> he announced from the pulpit, like, "we're gonna start a boxing club. on mondays, wednesdays and fridays, send your kids up to --" >> jimmy: yeah, so they'd stay out of trouble and -- >> yeah, that was exactly it. and all of us arrived on this parochial hall on a monday -- monday evening. big pair of boxing gloves, priest hat and a book. "how to box." [ laughter ] and why did you get out? why'd you get out? >> i -- well, i started when i was nine and i had my last fight when i was 17. i got concussed in a fight.
and i actually won the fight. >> jimmy: you think. that's what they told you. [ laughter ] yeah. >> but i -- i came out of the ring and my trainer said, "go down to the dressing room and get changed." i was like, "dressing room? changed?" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: "what does that mean?" >> literally, "what does it mean?" it lasted for like three minutes, four minutes. >> jimmy: no. >> and i thought, "oh. it's starting to hurt." >> jimmy: yeah, it was. yeah, you gotta get out of that. but then, you -- thank god you went into acting. but did acting ever bring you -- did you ever meet any like famous boxers? and tell them your story or talk -- talk shop? who was -- like, who was the most famous boxer? >> muhammad ali. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: doesn't get bigger than that. did you talk to him -- did you talk to him about boxing? >> well, i'll you tell you a story. i -- he was over in 1980. i was living in london.
he came over in 1980 -- '81. he was promoting a film called "freedom road" with kris kristofferson. it wasn't the greatest piece of cinema. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: sure, sure. >> but my girlfriend at the time -- up and coming young actress by the name of helen mirren. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: really? >> me and her boyfriend are -- he was a big shakespearian -- >> jimmy: sure. >> and we had just done this film "excalibur" together. so, she couldn't resist my charm. so, anyway -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. please! >> so, we were together. and -- but she knew the producer of this -- of muhammad's film. >> jimmy: yeah. >> so we got invited to this dorchester hotel. it was a private audience with muhammad ali. so i'm like -- like this. and there's about ten of us in the room. muhammad eventually comes in. he still had two fights ahead of him. so, he was like a greek adonis. he was just the most beautiful,
extraordinary specimen. >> jimmy: was he as big -- >> giant. well, he was my height but he was bigger. 6'4" and just -- >> jimmy: really? and then -- you afraid to even just sit next to him or -- >> well, we all formed, like, a kind of a semi-circle because he came around and introduced himself. and, as he made his way, i thought, "he's gonna come for me. i have to say something to muhammad ali." i'm never gonna meet him again in my life. i actually did, but -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you never know. >> he came to me and he shook me hand. i looked him straight in the eye and i started to cry and i go, "muhammad -- i love you." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he's like, "this is why i don't go out. this is why i don't go out and meet people." >> so then -- so, helen -- helen mirren was standing on this side of me and he shakes her -- and then he starts flirting with, like, in a real and i'm kinda going like, "whoa, muhammad ali's flirting with my
girlfriend." [ laughter ] how cool is that? >> jimmy: how cool is that? yeah. that's great. yeah. that's awesome. i love that. i think he's got a good sense of humor, that guy, muhammad ali. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i've seen him a couple -- some interviews with him. >> jimmy: it's brilliant. so it's "taken," the first one. i freaked out. loved it. saw it packed with movieseers. people were screaming and going nuts and i go, "that's exactly what you want in a movie." you wanna eat popcorn and go, "yeah, get him! come on!" and how rad and what a rock star you are on the phone and i go, "come on!" people were like -- standing ovation. >> it was a good, compact, tight, little european thriller. and the second one is the same as well. and you don't have to have seen the first one to enjoy the second. >> jimmy: okay, but who gets taken now? >> well, i'm gonna use your line from last time -- i give her away. >> jimmy: yeah, this one -- you go, "here, you take her." >> because she's such a pain in the butt. >> jimmy: yeah, you do -- take her. yeah, just called "take her." yeah, it was originally called "take her 2." "just take her. i'm -- after the first one, look at what i went through." >> please. >> jimmy: but i said -- i said that you get taken. i said -- are you gonna get taken? you're not gonna get taken?
you can't say. >> i can't -- >> jimmy: 'cause it spoils the movie? >> well, i can't really say. yeah, it does. >> jimmy: something gets taken. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and you get it back by all means. >> i try and take it back, yeah. >> jimmy: oh, gosh. it's the greatest. it's such a good thing. i -- honestly, that's all you need to know when you go in to see this movie and liam neeson just kicks butt in this movie. we have a clip of liam neeson in "taken 2." it's out this weekend, you guys. enjoy yourself. >> [ coughs ] [ grunting ] ♪ [ groaning ] ♪ [ groaning ] >> i'm dying! ah! oh, oh! >> how's it going?
>> listen to me carefully kim. you mother and i are gonna be taken. >> jimmy: there you go, right there! that's what i'm talking about! [ cheers and applause ] you're the greatest, brother. hey -- irishman to irishman, i was just wondering, before you leave, would you like to play a game? a quick game? >> um -- [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: a pub game. put some money on it? >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: well, let's talk about that when we get back. liam neeson and i are playing a game when we get back. come on back. it's fun. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ i have a cold... i took dayquil,
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and shrimp in reaching distance. [ male announcer ] book your perfect hotel in the perfect spot with ultra fast orbitz mobile apps. orbitz. take vacation back. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. we're here with the one and only, liam neeson. "taken 2" is in theaters this is weekend. we're going to play a little pub game called, "bar shuffleboard." okay. [ applause ] i love this game. the rules are simple. we'll play two rounds. it touches the line, the lower score. liam, you'll be red. i'll be blue. want to start a cup? >> sure. >> jimmy: all right. because i have my beer over there. and i have -- >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: a glass of wine for you. what's your favorite wine? do you have one? >> pinot noir -- >> jimmy: oh, yeah? >> oregon. somewhere from oregon. >> jimmy: yeah, dude, hey -- good man. [ cheers and applause ] all right, brother. >> these glasses are plastic. [ laughter ]
usually, where i come from that means there's going to be a fight. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, no, no! let's go to commercial. all is good -- all right. good luck. >> okay. >> jimmy: yeah. you can take these off, by the way. a little sawdust. ♪ >> jimmy: ooh. >> one. >> jimmy: oh, oh. interesting. yeah. >> that's huge. sorry, jimmy. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: come on! play again. >> yeah. aah-choo! [ audience ohs ] [ in unison ] oh! >> oh! [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: ha. god bless you. [ laughter ] >> don't bring religion into this. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: gesundheit. ♪ [ audience ohs ] [ in unison ] oh! >> jimmy: that's a tricky strategy. really tricky. ♪ >> nice! [ audience oohs ] >> jimmy: that's still deuce. it's really rare that i get -- >> excuse me one second.
[ laughing ] >> jimmy: yeah, that will help. [ light laughter ] all right. ♪ >> no, no, no, no. >> jimmy: no, that's just -- no -- that's just plain -- >> did i tell you i broke my hand? >> jimmy: oh, you did not. [ light laughter ] when you were boxing? nice try. ♪ >> oh. >> jimmy: oh. >> whoa! thanks, jimmy >> jimmy: i don't like that. that was too distracting. that was a lane went over there. >> no, no, no -- what am i doing? >> jimmy: ooh. here we go. here we go. this is good. [ light laughter ] >> just killer instincts. aw! ooh! >> jimmy: all right, that's it. that's the first round. what do we got? what's the score? >> steve: 4-2. >> jimmy: 4-2, all right. liam -- come down -- wait. i have four? liam has two. here we go. >> okay. >> jimmy: all right. now, i go first this time and then you can knock it off. yeah. right. here we go, red. 4-2, i got a decent lead.
♪ >> achoo! [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. that sneezing is -- that sneezing is making me work at it. it actually helps me, yeah. ♪ [ laughing ] it really does. ♪ >> no, no, no. don't -- down to the board. >> jimmy: here you go. that's three. [ audience oohs ] >> oh. gutter ball. >> jimmy: gutter ball. >> gutter ball. >> jimmy: oh, my god, really? now you're having fun? [ laughter ] ♪ >> get up there. get up there. get up there. oh! [ applause ] >> jimmy: hey, it wasn't that good. [ laughter ] ♪ >> oh. >> jimmy: come on -- oh. >> right in there. >> jimmy: too much mustard on that one. [ light laughter ] do people say that? >> steve: worked hard -- [ audience ohs ]
>> jimmy: all right, here we go. >> steve: is this your last puck? >> jimmy: yes. >> i beg your pardon? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thank you. thank you. >> steve: that's what he said. [ laughter ] [ audience ohs ] >> jimmy: oh. >> all right, jimmy. now, this is it. >> jimmy: wait. what's the score now? >> steve: the score -- as it stands right now, you've got six, liam's got five. >> jimmy: all right, so, he needs two to win? >> steve: yep, two to win. is this the barn burner? ♪ >> jimmy: oh! [ cheers and applause ] liam neeson, the champion, right here! "taken 2" into theaters everywhere on friday, go check it out. joanna garcia swisher joins us next! there she is right now in the bud light platinum suite! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ liquid plumr double impact ... ... double impact?! ...
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>> i want to go on the road with them. >> jimmy: i mean, you can't beat the roots. come on. there they are. yeah, the greatest. come on. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for coming back to see us. >> thanks for having me. >> jimmy: we love you. >> it's been such a long time since i've been here, but i've been in marital bliss. >> jimmy: you added another name since i last saw you. >> i did. >> jimmy: when you were here, you were joanna garcia now you're joanna garcia swisher. >> got a mouth full. yes, i am. >> jimmy: congratulations. >> thank you. [ applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: you look so happy! >> i am happy. well, you know nick, so -- >> jimmy: oh, he's the greatest. >> yeah. >> jimmy: nick swisher is her husband from the new york yankees, and -- [ cheers and applause ] he's awesome. we love swish. but i mean, look. do you like being married? i mean, did you know that it was going to be this much fun? >> it's the best. i mean, i kind of had a feeling i was signing up for fun when i married him. but it just -- makes everything better. it really does. all the highs are much higher and the lows aren't so low. >> jimmy: i like that. >> and he loves you. >> jimmy: he does? >> i told you earlier he imagines in his head when he does talk shows -- he only imagines jimmy does them.
so, he'll be like, "and then, i was, like, doing this and i say, 'jimmy.'" and i'm like, "so, when you think of telling a story, you only imagine telling it to jimmy?" and he's like, "yeah, that's my guy." >> jimmy: i love it. last time i went to go see a game -- i always scream his name. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and so, i was like, "come on, swish." and it's full count. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and i hate -- >> stressed out. >> jimmy: i just don't like full count. >> me, too. >> jimmy: i can't imagine if i was married to him. but i was -- i'm not married to nick. we didn't even date. [ laughter ] but i'm hoping for him, and i'm rooting for him like, "come on." and he hit it. smashed a home run. >> i love those. >> jimmy: two-run homer, and it was awesome. he's just cool. i mean, that must feel great. >> so chicks and jimmy fallon love the long ball. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. absolutely. i love it. do you freak out, though, when you watch the playoffs? now, they're in the playoffs on friday. >> yes, thank goodness. well, hopefull they'll win the division, so -- >> jimmy: yeah, oh, yeah. >> that's what they're working on now, right? [ applause ] >> jimmy: well, what do you do? do you -- is he superstitious? do you not go to the games? do you go to certain games? >> no, he's really not. he's just kind of relaxed, which makes me a little nervous, but they're all really relaxed. they're all pros over there, so -- >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. >> i just kind of sometimes have
to say a lot of prayers, but -- it's stressful! yeah. i want him to hit a home run every time he goes to bat, so, you know. >> jimmy: that's hard to do, yeah. >> is that so much to ask? >> jimmy: yeah, come on. there's no pressure, husband. nice try. you have a theory, which i think is very interesting. i think it's true. you say the key to a happy marriage is to get a second television. >> absolutely. for video games. specifically. yes. >> jimmy: so, the husband or the wife plays video games? >> nick, in our case. i don't know -- i'm imagining you're the video game guy. >> jimmy: yeah, i have -- >> but yeah, we actually have in our new york apartment here -- we put up this really cool thing where we have this smaller tv that sits next to the bigger tv so i can watch home and garden and, you know, whatnot, "animal practice" and "guys with kids." and nick can play video games. let's talk about "animal practice." >> yes. >> jimmy: 'cause i'm so happy. i'm producing the show after "animal practice," but "animal practice" is wednesday nights. >> 8:00. >> jimmy: at 8:00. and you guys seen the show? have you seen this? it's a fantastic show. [ cheers and applause ] >> oh!
>> jimmy: got that little -- well, at first, i was like, it's a monkey doctor. >> it's ridiculous. >> jimmy: and i go, "i don't know if i'm gonna -- i don't know if i'm gonna laugh at this. i don't know what is going on with this." >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's so funny. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you're great in it. justin's great in it. >> thank you. yeah, and he was -- he just visited you. >> jimmy: yeah. let me set up the show a little bit. you are the boss of this hospital. >> yes. >> jimmy: and also, you're the ex-girlfriend of justin kirk. >> yeah, and we both have very different sort of stories of how our relationship ended. he's not -- he's none too pleased when i show up and tell him that i will now be his boss. but he's slowly warming up to me. i think it's 'cause he still has a thing for me, but i don't know. >> jimmy: yeah, we'll see. yeah, exactly. >> he hasn't admitted it yet, but -- >> jimmy: it's super fun. there's a zillion, zillion animals. >> literally, a zillion. >> jimmy: oh, it's fantastic. i love it so much. i want to show everyone a clip from joanna garcia swisher's new show, "animal practice," wednesdays on nbc. >> aw, i'm beat. >> work the shoulders, rizzo. >> that can't be doing anything. >> no, not for me. he finds it relaxing. he's been a little stressed. >> oh, his hammock's at the
cleaners. >> george, do you mind if i give doug the surgery on the -- that just came in? >> yeah, go for it. why? you need me for something bigger? >> no, i just -- i think doug's better for this one. >> there's no circumstance in which old sausage fingers here would be better for surgery than me. >> my fingers do not look like sausages. >> i know. they smell like sausages. you eat too many sausages. >> jimmy: there you go. [ cheers and applause ] you guys, watch joanna garcia swisher on "animal practice" wednesdays, 8:00 p.m. on nbc. up next, a song from matt & kim. see you after the break. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guests will release their fourth album "lightning" tomorrow and they're here tonight to play the opening track from it called "let's go." please welcome back to our show, matt and kim. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ oooh oooh oooh let's go oooh oooh oooh i was up in my head ♪ ♪ for everything i said quote a million words they're all made with lead
i bought a megaphone ♪ ♪ to use inside your home forgot the batteries but that's the old me shouting out of my windows ♪ ♪ rolled down 'cause i don't care anymore said i don't care let's go ♪ ♪ let's go let's go let's go oooh ♪ ♪ ooh ooooh let's go let's go ♪ ♪ let's go let's go i'm standing on the top of a parking lot ♪ ♪ i gave it all i had show me what you got there's some things i found that make so much sound ♪ ♪ all these words i don't need them now shouting out of my windows
rolled down ♪ ♪ 'cause i don't care anymore said i don't care let's go let's go ♪ ♪ let's go let's go oooh ooh ♪ ♪ ooooh hey hey hey hey let's go let's go ♪ ♪ let's go let's go >> make some noise! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ we love you, jimmy! ♪ say what you wanna say make it mean everything ♪ ♪ oh say what you wanna say make it mean everything say what you wanna say make it mean everything ♪
♪ oh say what you wanna say let's go let's go let's go ♪ ♪ let's go oooh ooh ooooh ♪ ♪ hey hey hey hey let's go let's go let's go ♪ ♪ let's go hey hey hey hey let's go let's go ♪ ♪ let's go let's go say what you wanna say make it mean everything ♪ ♪ oh say what you wanna say make it mean everything say what you wanna say make it mean everything ♪ ♪ oh say what you wanna say let's go let's go let's go ♪ ♪ let's go [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: there you go. that's what i'm talking about. that's what i'm talking about. matt and kim. good to see you, bro. thank you so much. check out their record "lightning." all my thanks to liam neeson, joanna garcia swisher, matt and kim, once again! [ ch a